A Minion Interlude
Huge caveat: I am still working through an immense backlog on this blog — at this point in 2022, I have 33 trips I intend to write about (eventually). What's more, I am CURRENTLY TRAVELING for the next month before I depart for my MBA! I've come to terms with the likelihood that I will never write any of these posts on time.
Because of that, I've decided to bite the bullet and write this important PSA: Minions have taken over the world and they must be stopped. I first got an inkling of this takeover on Euro exchange 2017. Arguably, Despicable Me had come out recently and it was quite a sensation (note, I just fact-checked this and discovered that Despicable Me actually came out in 2010, SEVEN YEARS PRIOR to my European exchange. There's no excuse for their longevity). Then I came back to Europe this year (2022) and discovered that Minions are still EVERYWHERE! I chalked it up to a European quirk and decided to write a blog post titled "Minions in Europe." But as I compiled the evidence, I was shocked to discover minions in even more places around the world.
I don't trust the world to get over Minion Fever anytime soon, so please treat this post as an ongoing project (much healthier than my Gelato tour of Europe from 2017).
Offensive Beginnings [2017]
On Euro exchange in 2017, the minion phenomenon was at a fever pitch. I had come to accept their constant presence in the form of tic tacs and billboards. Still, there were a couple egregious uses of the Minion brand that I simply had to share, even back then: for one, there was Minion flavoured ice cream(??) in Lucerne, Switzerland. Then, there was Minion-scented PERFUME(?!) in Puglia, Italy. What do Minions even smell/taste like? Does anyone REALLY want to know?!
Alarming fanaticism [2018-2019]
In the subsequent years after exchange, I found Minion advocates in the most unexpected places. On the right, you can see my own brother proudly sporting a Minion t-shirt in 2019. Other friends like Gloria were also vocal Minion allies. I politely supported my people, but with an uneasy sense of foreboding.
Minions for... good? [2020]
In 2020, I honestly pretty much stayed inside. But someone I knew shared this billboard with me, so I knew Minions were still wielding their unfathomable influence in NYC. I mean, of all things, I suppose I'll allow Minions to convey important messages like encouraging people to wear masks during the height of an un-vaccinated COVID-19 world.
Minion Fever takes North America [2021]
Vancouver & Mississauga, respectively
As the world re-opened, the Minions returned in full-force. To the left is a set of Minion-themed seaweed(?!) found at a grocery store on my Vancouver trip with Henry and Richard. To the right is a giant Minion at Sugar Marmalade, a dessert café in Mississauga that I visited over the holidays with Steph, Shauna, Alex, and Anaëlle. I'm not trying to be all "NIMBY" here, but... seriously, NOT IN MY BACKYARD, PLEASE. Why was there a giant Minion taking up valuable real-estate where guests could be sitting?
Europe remains the Minion Mecca [2022]
Returning to Europe this year, I've come to begrudgingly accept that Minions are here to stay. Not only are they terrorizing innocent citizens in hotel rooms...
I really don’t know what to say about my hotel room view pic.twitter.com/LrLmwi1az2
— Alana Herrnson (@aperiplatypus) June 23, 2022
But they're also stamped on pretty much every packaged food product in existence. So far, I've already spotted: Minion corn sticks in Croatia, Minion popsicles (ugh, more Minion ice cream?!) in Slovenia, and Minion-endorsed ketchup in the Dolomites (at least, I hope it's just Minion-endorsed and not... Minion-flavoured, ew).
Croatia, Slovenia, and Italy, respectively
Worst of all, my friends pointed out that I've even started dressing like a Minion! As the saying goes, "You are what you eat" — so I've been staunchly avoiding any Minion-related food to prevent a full-scale Minion transformation. The journey is projected to only get more difficult though, because I seem to stumble upon more Minions on a daily basis. Wish me luck as my travels continue.
